The best chillout record?

Three 6 Mafia – ‘Lick My Nuts’. I love Triple 6. Always chills me out because they usually say what I’m thinking so I don’t have to. I can just leave this on someone’s voicemail or send it in an email and avoid the whole ‘hey, fuck you’ routine. I’ve always admired their productions. Their beats go hard as fuck, but they float really smooth at the same time. Their old shit is beyond brilliant. They suck now. They did something with Tiësto and, well… that pretty much explains it. That is what is called a tragedy.

The best record for a family party?

Formation Records’ Formation Colour Series. I don’t have much family. We never really partied anyways. A ‘family party’ is a nightmare for me unless they are listening to some shit like this. The only family that I knew that ever did was the family of one of my ex-girlfriends who is now dead. They would rock jungle and dope-ass techno on every holiday, every birthday, etc. Anyone who knows what the fuck this series is… they’re totally welcome in my home.

The soundtrack to a lazy Sunday afternoon?

Haus Arafna – ‘Last Dream Of Jesus’. I have sex with lazy nuns on Sunday afternoons. I always play this to get them in the mood. They tell me it’s a dream ‘cum’ true. That isn’t true, but it would be awesome if it was. Ayyyyy-MENNNN!

The worst record you’ve ever heard?

My shit sucks. I will be the first one to tell you that. It isn’t popular, it isn’t glamorous, it’s not meant for beach parties, I never give two shits if it sells, and it doesn’t have people singing about dumb bullshit unless it’s me fucking around on purpose. I just try to make shit that expresses me accurately. That’s why people are reading this to begin with.

I’m a horrible DJ and producer who has no range and doesn’t know a damn thing about music. I always sound the same for my entire DJ set, and on every track and remix I make. I never take chances for the sake of pushing creativity. I tell everyone I’m an artist, but I’m just a fraudulent, flakey fuck with a manager, who kisses ass.

I make the worst records I have ever heard. My new PR campaign – Fuck Me – I’m Shit t-shirts and bumper stickers…

The future classic?

Wolfgang Voigt – ‘Fremde Hände’. My favourite electronic music producer of all time. If most people could even wrap their heads around this track – or understand how much music this guy makes, how much music he has made under various aliases, and how much he has influenced everyone whether they realise it or not – they would stop listening to all this dumb-ass ketamine crooner, idiotic, fake, garbage out here. But they won’t. It blows my mind how many people have no idea who this guy is. It’s sad. Wolfgang Voigt is someone I will always regard with the utmost respect.

 

Find Kris on Facebook.

15th February, 2013

Comments

  • This guy ROCKS! And that’s all.

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